Xena and Gabby go to KFC
by Shnorkel
Summary: Xena and Gabrielle go to KFC and enjoy a nice meal to satisfy Gabrielle's never ending appetite. - Written many years ago but never uploaded.


**Xena And Gabby Go To: Kentucky Fried Chicken.**

**PG ****- Parental guidance is recommended for peoples under 10yrs of age. [=**

**Warnings**** - No bad language, No sex, No violence.**

**The story is just ment to be for humour but if you dont like KFC, your a vegetarain (like me!) and/or you dont like stories about devouring chicken then this aint the story for you...Oh, and if a single kiss between two consenting females bothers you..dont read the last sentence of this story.**

**Other wise..Enjoy! =]**

**Disclaimers:**** Xena, Gabrielle and Argo are not mine, I do not own them, they are the sole property and copyright of MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. All other characters do however belong to the author (me! :D) and were created solely for the entertainment of this story.**

_**By Shnorkel.**_

**© 23****rd**** March 2006.**

_**As the sun rose and shon brightly over Amazonia, it's warm light flooded in through the small square window in the large wooden hut, of which the Warrior Princess and Battling Bard were sleeping soundly. Gabrielle stretched half heartedly, moaning and groaning as the suns warmth touched her face, her short golden-blonde hair was a tangled mess as she rolled out of bed, sleepy eyed and tired.**_

_**"Xena, wake up, I'm hungry!" The bard groaned at the raven haired warrior who had rolled over to contine sleeping.**_

_**Gabrielle ripped the soft sheets off of the bed, that were keeping Xena so obviously warm and comfortable. The warrior looked up, opening her bright, peircing baby blues in annoyance, she ran her fingers through her messy tangle of raven black hair, that seemed to flow so easily down her shoulders and back.**_

_**"Gabriiieeeelle!" She moaned as she slowly crawled out of the warm bed. "Why must you wake me up like that?" The strong warrior questioned her bard as they got dressed.**_

_**Gabrielle looked up from putting her boots on and said quietly, almost angrily,**_

_**"Well we've slept in yet again Xena, I'm starving and we've probably missed breakfast..again!"**_

_**Xena finished putting on her leather tunic and was putting on her brass breastplate when she looked over at Gabrielle.**_

_**"Gabrielle, your the Queen of the Amazons, since when do you miss out on breakfast or follow **__**thier**__** schedule? Thier supposed to follow you."**_

_**Gabrielle rolled her eyes in annoyance at Xena as she slipped her sais' into the sides of her red leathered boots, that matched her soft leathered red tank top and short skirt.**_

_**"Xena, if we aren't in the food hut for breakfast, we dont eat breakfast!" The bard stated clearly.**_

_**"Fine...lets go then." The warrior replied as she pulled on her second leather boot and detangled her hair with her fingers as best she could.**_

_**The two soulmates left the thier hut and went to join the Amazons for breakfast. As they approached the food hut, the usual sound of chattering couldn't be heard, instead it was quiet. Xena opened the door slowly, but before she could enter, she was roughly pushed aside by Gabrielle who barged through the door as her stomach let out a loud growl. Xena pursed her lips as she entered and looked around to see an empty hut, bowls and plates left messy on the wooden table tops. The young Amazon Queen turned to Xena, fire in her emerald green eyes, the warrior subconciously took a single step back, her own stomach now begging for the satisfaction of food.**_

_**"Look I'm sure I could hunt us a rabbit or two...or even go down to the creek for some fish...or eel." **_

_**She paused for a second, scanning the bards face for any hint of approval. **_

_**"I'll even cook it for us!"**_

_**The warrior added quickly.**_

_**Gabrielle hung her head in a sulk, her stomach let out another rumble as if it was demanding to be fed at that very moment.**_

_**"I dont want rabbit, I dont want fish and I dont want any eel for Tarturas sake!"**_

_**Xena's strong arms wrapped around the Amazon Queen at that moment, embracing her into a warm hug., something the raven haired beauty didn't do often. She stroked her soulmates soft blonde hair as she comforted her.**_

_**"Come on, come with me and we'll get a real feast!"**_

_**Xena's eyes lit up brightly upon saying these few words, her mouth watered and she could almost taste the delacacies, simply by the thought of them. She lead Gabrielle back out of the big but empty and messy food hut and back into the warmth of the sun. The hungry blonde didn't bother to ask questions, she knew better then to question the Warrior Princess, a long, strong arm suddenly pulled her up behind the warrior, onto a beautiful golden horse, she wrapped her arms tightly around Xena's waist as Argo galloped off at a ssteady pace. **_

_**They hadn't been traveling for long, when a sudden scent began to linger. Xena lifted her nose into the air taking in the sweet smeel that once again made her mouth water.**_

_**"Xena, what is that! It smells..." Gabrielle paused to smell the peculiar scent once more, "It smells delicious...like...like...herbed rabbit?"**_

_**Argo sped up, under command from the warrior, she broke into a sprint, taking her two riders down a slight hill, the path was obviously well used, it was wide and dusty, small stones were scattered across the the dirt road as Argo took them along it.**_

_**Xena's signature warcry rung out through the surrounding trees as she sprung into the air, flipping and landing at the entrance to a fair sized tavern, she was soon joined by Gabrielle who was looking up at the building in awe. The roof was made of red bricked tiles, there was a sign that was kind of shaped like a pail, it had some old guys face painted on it and it said 'KFC'. The two women walked towards the two big, glass doors which opened by themselves as they approached them. They jumped in surprise at the doors opening and continued to walk inside, they walked up to the marble counter where a short woman stood, by a strang device that seemed to take your order some how.**_

_**The girls black hair was pulled back into a tight bun which was covered by a black hairnet and a blue cap with the 'KFC' written in red across the front. She had sparkling green eyes, that seemed to shine in the lighting of the tavern and smiled widely as the two warrior women approached her, she wore a black skirt that draped to her knees, with smooth dark stockings beneath it, her slip on, shiney black, slightly platformed shoes seemed to be covered in what looked like animal fat and bread crumbs and on the left side of her chest, on her light blue blouse, she wore a small gold name badge that titled her as a cadet manager, her name was short with a nice ring to it, engraved in he badge read the name, 'Shanni'.**_

_**They were suddenly pulled out of their trance by the speach of the young woman who was serving them,**_

_**"Hi, how are you today?"**_

_**She spoke with a polite, friendly smile.**_

_**"Good, thanks." Gabrielle beamed back.**_

_**"Thats good, how may I help you's today?" Shanni replied, still smileing.**_

_**The two women looked over the menu that was given to them and ponded for a moment, unsure of what they wanted, after a few moments silence however, Xena spoke up.**_

_**"A mega feast please." her voice a little croaky with hunger,**_

_**Shanni collected thier payment of five dinars and set off to collect thier food for them. She worked quickly and proffesionaly, grabbing original recipe chicken with her tongs with speed and poise, placing them in a small cardboard serving box, she scooped up two boxes of crispy, fresh, seasoned potato chips and grabbed two large pots of steamy, hot, potato and gravy, she then grabbed a small paper bag which also had that old mans face painted on it and scooped up little, golden, chicken nuggets, placeing them into the bag and grabbed a big bottle of fizzy, ice cold, refreshing mountain dew and grabbed two straws, two spoons, two refreshment wipes and two serviettes, she placed all of this skillfully onto a red serving tray infront of the two starving warrior women.**_

_**Xena and Gabrielle's mouths watered as they looked at the tray of steamy, fresh, delicious, goods that stood before them. Gabrielle snatched up the tray as they rushed across the white, tiled floor, they sat at a round marble table in the corner of the room next to a big glass window that was impossibly clean, the walls were made of ceramic tiles that were checkered in a red and blue pattern and the tables and chairs were all made of shiney marble.**_

_**Xena ripped open the box of steamy chicken while Gabrielle went straight for a hot pot of potato and gravy, dipping deliciously salted, fresh chips into the pot then devouring the delacacy. Xena's perfectly white teeth tore through a peice of juicy chicken, the spiced skin tingled her tongue as she bit, chewed and sucked at the perfectly tender chicken, her teeth scraped the small leg bone as she was determined to get every last peice of meat into her mouth.**_

_**Once she was finished with that peice of chicken she dipped her fingers into the soft potato and gravy, then licked the great food from her greasy fingers, her closed tightly as she took in every smell, every touch and every flavour of the magnificent feast before them. Gabrielle's eyes shon brightly with desire as she ripped a chicken thigh from the box, she ran her tongue along the the steaming, spicey skin, the texture was crunchy, crispy, perfect, she seemed to be in heaven as the juicy chicken rolled around in her mouth.**_

_**Thy both seemed to have been letting out involuntary moans of pleasure as they were digging into the food like it was the last meal they were ever gonna eat..or the first they had ever had. Xena grabbed the bottled of mountain due, taking the lid off in a hurry, the women took a straw each, slurpping at the fizzy liquid, letting it flow into thier mouths and roll down thier tongues and slip down thier throats, it was cold, refreshing...adictive but when theyn finally pulled away from the soft drink there was a tingling, burning sensation in the back of thier throats and in thier stomachs. Then without warning Xena let out a belch that seemed to go for forever, which was followed by a more lady like burp from Gabrielle, who let out small girly giggle and covered her mouth slightly with her feminine hand.**_

_**Xena took the small paper bag of crispy, chicken nuggets into her hand, opening it to inspect the contents within.**_

_**"Whats this...?" She asked with curiousity which seemed to be the first words spoken between the duo in quite some time, as Xena sniffed the foreign peice of food.**_

_**"I dunno...Try em', they look good." Was her reply from the now sated blonde bard who snatched the bag from her warrior and stuffed several chicken nuggets into her mouth, chewing and suckling the juicy goodness from them, letting a small dribble of saliva escape from the corner of her full mouth as she mumbled with delicious taste of the chicken.**_

_**"Mmph..bis ish sho b'ood!" **_

_**The young Amazon Queen exclaimed , to which the Warrior Princess gave her a look of questioning as she popped two crispy, fresh, delicious, nuggets into her mouth, not understanding a thing her comrad had just said.**_

_**The famous duo continued to stuff thier pretty little faces with the delectable Kentucky Fried Chicken, untill they couldn't possibly eat any more. Thier stomachs were bloated and thier hands, lips and fingers were all greasy, they sat back in thier seats, satisfied completley with the meal and services.**_

_**Gabrielle smiled and patted her bloated stomach, graving running down from the edge of her lips.**_

_**"I guess we should miss breakfast more often." she said almost softly, still smileing brightly, which earned her a big smile in return from her Warrior Princess.**_

_**"I guess so Gab, I guess so."**_

_**And with that, Xena threw a chicken bone, that once had juicy meat wrapped around it, at the bin, which was a perfect shot, earning her a look of surprise from Gabrielle.**_

_**"I have many skills, Gabrielle." Xena remarked with her brows raised and her lips curled into a small smile.**_

_**Gabrielle rolled her eyes and picked up a chicken bone, throwing it at the bin, missing it by an inch, everytime she tried, she missed, which was annoying because Xena got it everytime. By the time they had run out of bones to throw, Gabrielle started throwing chips..which she also could not get into the bin, and they had soon run out of chips aswell, the floor was a mess! It was covered in cold chips and greasy chicken bones.**_

_**Xena polished off the rest of the juicy, tender, succulent chicken nuggets, then scrunched up the paper bag and threw it into the small metal bin with one swift wing of her left arm. Gabrielle was determined and began scooping up spoonfuls of potato and gravy and flicking them at the bin, only to miss still.**_

_**A few hours later, the place looked horrible, Shanni came out to ask the pair to leave, but as she approached the famous warrior duo, Gabrielle flung another spoonful of now stone cold potato at the bin, which ofcoarse missed and hit Shanni with a SPLAT! IT spread across her face, her hair, down her chest and even got up her nose some how, she froze in her tracks and slowly opened her eyes, wipeing the potato from them and looked up at the two women who has stopped immediatley with pursed lips and thier heads hung low, trying thier very best not to let out roars of laughter.**_

_**"Out..! Now..!" Were the only, simple words that came from the Cadet Manager's mouth as she pointed towards the doors of the large tavern, her eyes once again closed, as if an attempt to keep calm as the duo slowly lifted themselves from thier seats and slowly walked past Shanni with thier heads hung low.**_

_**"We're terribly sorry..really.." Spoke Gabrielle softly and sincerely as she looked up to meet green eyes with green eyes briefly.**_

_**HEr only reply was a slight nod before the potato covered worker closed her eyes again. Xena and Gabrielle left without another word or mumble, but as they looked back they saw the greasy chicken bones scattered all over the floor, blos and splats of potato and gravy covered the floors, walls, windows, chairs and tables, accompanied by the many chips, their table had been left a complete mess, mountain dew trickled off of the edge of the table from the bottle laying on it's side, into a pool of stickyness on the tiled floor, and to make things worse, as they left the restraunt, Argo had done her business on the path leading up to the self-opening glass doors.**_

_**Xena and Gabrielle looked at each other and a smile edged it's way onto Xena's face as Gabrielle smirked, before bursting into fits of laughter.**_

_**"Thats the most fun I've had in such a long time, thanks Xena!" The Amazon Queen exclaimed to the raven haired warrior as she wrapped her arms around her waist and shared a brief, passionate kiss with her lover and soulmate, upon being pulled up onto Argo.**_

_**"Just wait until tonight then." Xena replied to her young bard with a little smirk on her face as they rode off, back to Amazonian camping grounds, with stomachs and sattisfied appetites.**_

**The Delicious End. **

_**Xenite Disclaimer**____**- No chickens or Kentucky Fried Chicken restraunts were harmed in the making of this Fan Fic story, however, Xena and Gabby are now banned from ever returning to KFC again.**_


End file.
